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Welcome to Dr. Turndorf's Advice Archives, the web's first searchable dating, relationship and sex advice database since 1995.

Start by searching my Advice Archives, which contain thousands of answers to questions like yours. Reading what I have told others who are struggling with issues that are similar to yours will help you to heal and grow.The Archives contain thousands of Dr. Turndorf's answers to the dating,relationship and sex questions that Dr. Turndorf has received over the

Search your topic of concern, and learn, heal and grow as you read answers to questions just like yours.

Question: My Love Life is a Lifetime Movie

I am so sorry to hear how you’ve suffered. You mentioned that being jilted at the altar humiliated your family. But what about you?

I have the impression that you don’t honor yourself enough.

When we don’t feel... read more

Question: My Wife Confessed She Kissed Another Man and Love for Me has Waned and Doesn't Think of Me as a Husband,. What Should I Do?

I am so glad that you felt safe enough with me to share your story.

It’s a very sad story.

Here’s what happened. When you lived out of town for work, your wife, apparently, took this as a personal rejection. She thought... read more

Question: When a Man Changes His Mind after 4 Years

I totally understand your predicament. What a painful position to be in. You love each other but you don’t want to lose the chance to be married and have a child.

There’s no “right” answer here.

I... read more

Question: They Say the Best Way to Get Your Ex Back is to Ignore Him, but What Do You do Next?

I know you’ve been playing the Silent Treatment game and I’m not into games.

First of all, I want to tell you that this guy seems very passive. He’s complaining behind the scenes that you haven’t come after him. What’s wrong with his... read more

Question: Newlywed. Wife Dislikes Female Friend

You are really in tough spot. I understand that you are angry with your wife for taking a friend from you. And for her not understanding who you are--a person who empathizes with those who are lonely and displaced.

Of course, a wife needs... read more

Question: Where to Go from Here

I understand why you feel stuck. This aspect of your marriage is broken. You guys are suffering from what I call a Value Conflict. Many couples make the mistake of trying to change each other’s values, which we can’t and shouldn’t attempt... read more

Question: Is it Worth it?

What a nightmare. You asked me if this relationship is worth your getting hurt so much?

My answer is NO. No relationship should hurt like this.

This relationship has so many strikes against it.

First, what his... read more

Question: Help a Firefighter Who is in Love with his Ex... but Confused by her actions...

Well, my dear confused fireman, Dr. Love who is all about connecting souls and saving relationships wherever possible wants to help you put out the flames that still burn for your old flame.

You asked me a lot of questions.... read more

Question: She Left, Came Back, Then Left Again!


It must be very difficult for you to be on this up and down rollercoaster ride. 

I totally get what's happening here. 

Let me break it down for you. 

Your girl, without realizing it, has an Old Scar (... read more

Question: Sexual Issues in a Long Distance, Interracial, Big Age Gap Yet Super Fun Relationship

I appreciate your very clearly presented question. 

You say that you wonder if you're gay even though you're not attracted to men. So why assume you're gay? That's a leap, isn't it. 

I think you're jumping to that conclusion because... read more